Why is it people think that someone who talks about suicide won’t do it? This is a very common myth that circulates. In truth, most people who attempt suicide have talked about it or displayed some type of warning sign beforehand. This does not mean that it is your fault because you didn’t see the warning signs, most of the time, these signs are seen in hindsight.
Is it dangerous to mention suicide, or talk about suicide with a depressed person, because it may give them the idea? There is no research or evidence that indicates talking to people about suicide, in the context of care, respect, and prevention, increases their risk of suicidal ideation or suicidal behaviors. Research does indicate that talking openly and responsibly about suicide lets a potentially suicidal person know they do not have to be alone, that there are people who want to listen and who want to help. Most people are relieved to finally be able to talk honestly about their feelings, and this alone can reduce the risk of an attempt.
Isn’t suicide often a spontaneous act? Suicides can appear to happen fast, or “out of nowhere,” when we have not noticed any indications of a person’s suicidality. Although most people (80%) present a range of indicators to the people around them, few of us have been educated to recognize these warning signs and we miss them.
Suicides are also rarely the result of a single traumatic loss or change. Usually, there are many contributing factors and events that have developed or occurred over a period of time. A sudden traumatic event may be the ‘trigger’ event that moves a person to end their life, but it is unlikely the only cause.
It is likely that many suicides could be prevented if we educated ourselves about the immediate, short term, and long term indicators of suicidal risk, as well as how to reach out and get effective help for someone who is letting us know they are in serious distress.
Since my loved one is no longer depressed and they suddenly seem improved and happier, there is no longer a reason to be concerned? Hopefully, if a person seems better, they are indeed feeling better and are no longer considering suicide. HOWEVER, this apparent upswing in mood could also be an indicator of an increased risk of suicide. Sometimes, a suicidal person might feel relief that they have finally come to a decision – the emotional conflict over living or dying has been resolved. The best way to determine if a person’s improved mood is related to decreased or increased risk of suicide is to have a direct and open discussion about suicide.
Is it true that suicide rates are the highest during the holidays? Suicide rates are actually the highest in the season change, spring leading into summer.
Isn’t it a betrayal of trust if I break a secret and tell about someone’s suicide plan? It is never a betrayal to help someone be safe and alive. Just think about it, if your friend gets mad at least they are alive and they know someone cares.
Are people who attempt suicide “crazy”? No, anyone could attempt suicide. Suicide does not have any boundaries.
If a person is suicidal, does this mean they will always be suicidal? Most suicidal people are desperately seeking a way out of unbearable emotional pain and are ambivalent about ending their own lives. After receiving help to overcome this pain, many people go on to live rewarding and meaningful lives, never again seriously contemplating suicide. For others, a current suicidal crisis may be overcome and the risk of suicide significantly lowered or eradicated for a period of time. This period of time can range from minutes, hours or days, to possibly months, or even several years.
What can we do if we think someone is suicidal? It is important to show a potentially suicidal person that we care and that we are concerned for their safety. It is also important to directly ask the person if they are considering suicide. This shows that we are taking their feelings seriously, and helps to establish if the risk for suicide is real. If you feel uncomfortable asking, it is important that you get someone else to ask. We need to listen to the person – without judgment and by showing empathy. If the person says they are considering suicide, we need to get help for that person by enlisting the help of professionals, such as a family doctor, a mental health professional, a 24-hour crisis line, or even a hospital emergency room if the person is imminently at risk. It is also important to enlist familial, friendship and social supports. If the person is at imminent risk of harming themselves, do not leave them alone until they have been assessed and received help from a competent and trustworthy professional, or until another trustworthy adult arrives to stay with them.
